I am lucky to have so many comforting memories of my young years. When my brother and I were youngsters, we used to chase our little dog around our backyard. When we were a little older Mum and Dad would take us to the beach for swimming lessons and then to the kiosk for ice-cream on the way home. Later on as teens, we would spend time with the other neighborhood teenagers, riding our bicycles in the street until it got dark. More time goes by, we grow up, and then move away. Even though you love your parents and that will never change, it is easy for families to grow away from each other. It is this time of the year-holiday season-when we are reminded just how important it is not to take our family for granted.
Let Family Know You Appreciate Them
Showing appreciation of family members is so important, but sadly it is not always an easy thing to do. I never had an openly loving relationship with my father, for example. We're tough guys and sharing your feelings isn't the norm. Don't get me wrong, we know we love each other but it is unspoken. He had the same relationship with his father and never let him know that he loved him until it was too late. Because of this, I made certain to take on the responsibility of making sure things didn't end up the same way between my dad and me. Now, awkwardly, we share the "I love you son; I love you dad" moment. Still not perfect, but it is a work in progress. My partner's family is the polar opposite. When you come to dinner you get a hug upon arrival, and you get more hugs when you leave. It does make me a bit jealous sometimes, but it does give me something to try for.
Set Your Life Priorities
Look at life this way. If you died tomorrow, your coworkers would mourn you briefly but it is a guarantee you would be replaced and the office would go on without you. On the other hand, the family you leave behind will live with the loss for the rest of their lives. They will celebrate you often and they will never forget you. Now consider how much time you spend at work compared to the time you spend with your family. The level of importance should be very clear regarding time spent with loved ones, especially during the holidays. My mother and my aunt organise a massive family get-together each and every year during the holidays. My father's siblings consist of eight sisters and brothers. Each of them have at a minimum two kids of their own, grown now and some of those also have children! It is loud and busy and chaotic...but I wouldn't have it any other way. It is the best way I can think of to spend the holidays.
Make Time for Family
Make every endeavor to see your family. If it has been awhile, then take the first step; invite your family over for a nice dinner. Try to initiate get-togethers on a regular basis. If you live far from your family, give them a call on the telephone. You can rest assured they would love to hear from you. Reminisce together and let your family know how dear those memories are to you. Send them a letter or even an email if you are time poor. I am always getting spam emails from my mother, the kind of humorous junk emails that are so annoying and bothersome if they were to come from anyone else. She has a hidden agenda, I believe, conscious or not, to avoid being forgotten. She uses her joke emails as a reminder that she is still around and sure enough, we get a great dialogue going and we both feel better for it.
Every family has its good and bad times; there simply is no such thing as a perfect family. But it is the only one that you have and they will always be there for you. Try not to fight, the time we have together is limited. Never leave it until too late to show your appreciation and let your loved ones know you are thinking of them.
We have all been in a rut, locked in a pattern of circumstances that we can't seem to get out of. Sometimes, those circumstances change by themselves, but more often we need to take action to ensure that we don't become stuck in a rut. We aim to help you get out of a rut knowing they can affect any facet of life.
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